Perfection, People Pleasing & why it’s okay if your goal isn’t Oprah! Giving Perfection the Bird with Jenna & Ashley! Episode 12

 

 

From the moment I connected with Jenna & Ashley I knew I wanted to interview them for Lose Live Learn and share their message.

Perfectionism is such a sneaky mofo and as I shared in the interview I didn’t even realise I was a perfectionist until I became a mother and business owner. It had always been there, but it didn’t affect my life in a negative way.

Hey perfection it’s me, Melanie…

 

Despite all my practice to shed the perfectionist mindset, Jenna & Ashley challenged me during their recent challenge and I became aware of areas in my life in which I need to practice being more assertive and less of a people pleaser.

Now I didn’t even consider myself a people pleaser, but when arranging a meal out, I want to please everyone [IMPOSSIBLE] and I was like – damn it, I do this.

 

Why is perfection a problem?

 

Perfectionist tendencies are only an issue if they affect your life or happiness, and at some point this will show up. In my experience we all have some form of perfectionism, whether it’s keeping the perfect house, hiding our emotions or searching for the perfect diet/body.

When we can fill our own cup up, and not use external measures for our worthiness then we will find much more pleasure in our daily activities, and our success will no longer be measured against someone else’s showreel.

 

Do we trust perfection?

 

We are starting to get more savvy when we see the perfect image on social media, it’s just ONE of the reasons I love Instagram Stories, because I get to show you the REAL stuff! Trying to live a perfect life pretty much means you won’t see anything of my life AND it would require a whole lot of energy on my part — NO THANKS.

I want to show up ‘as is’ so if you see me in the airport at 6am, I look the same way as I do on social media.

#Iwokeuplikethis

 

Jenna & Ashley’s THREE Strategies to give perfection the middle finger!

 

1. Practice, practice and practice some more…

Ashley explains that like anything in life which we want to master, we must practice awareness of when perfectionism shows up. Some days we will be aware and feel like we have conquered it, others it may show up more, and we’ll be smacking it down.

You may not find you can check it off, stick with and practice. 

2. Maintain awareness around triggers which effect your behaviour

Jenna challenges you to maintain awareness around what triggers you to be head towards people pleasing or perfectionism.

What is driving your desire to do certain things? Whether it be choosing the brunch place or checking your stats on your business, why are you doing it?

Make a decision to either make a different choice or not…

3. Remove the external expectations

Let go of all the external focus, and focus on yourself. Turn your awareness inward, and tap into your intuition, ask yourself “How do I want to feel?”

All too often how we want to feel gets caught up in comparison and bullshit.

Middle Fingers Up!

 

Get MORE of Eff Perfect, and shed your perfectionism!

Website: www.effperfect.com

Take the pledge: www.effperfect.com/pledge

Instagram: instagram.com/effperfect

Podcast: Middle Finger to Perfection

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