I don’t like flying.
It’s a combination of fears, but mostly the plane will not reach the destination and I will not be here to raise my son. Despite this very real fear, I knew I wanted to attend the JillFit Business Retreat in Asheville this year, and I was going to fly alone.
It would have been easier for me to just ask my husband to fly with me, but I knew that to start overcoming my fear I needed to do this alone.
As it got closer to my departure date, I realised that I had somehow allowed myself to become dependant on my husband.
— I’d never checked in for a flight
— He always had the documents and passports
Somehow I’d found myself in this role in my marriage, and I hadn’t even noticed it had happened.
Three flights combined with 24-hours of travelling and I arrived in Asheville [convinced that my flying fears were behind me] excited and ready to explore a new city.
This trip meant a lot to me, I absorbed some great business information and strategy but it was more about connection. Connection to 75 other women who all want to build a business, they all want more out of life, and are willing to invest, learn and show up.
I spend my days immersed in the world of #girlboss but to actually be present with them is something different, to hear their stories, struggles and successes lights a fire under your ass.
— you are not alone
— even when you are making 6-figures you still have to do the same stuff!
— your fears are normal
— your voice makes you unique
— you’re REALLY not alone
This got me thinking about my coaching style and my Facebook group, this is what I want for all women — to know they are not alone. It’s one of the reasons I applied to Best of You, I wanted to meet likeminded women and actually find women who want to support your success and share your messages.
I spent most of my life thinking I liked being alone, but really, being alone was all I knew and I had yet to find my tribe. There’s a difference between being an introvert, and being alone because you lack connection with people.
I lacked connection.
These women have no idea how grateful I am to have them in my life, even if they are a few thousand miles away. The woman who started this process in January 2016 is not the same woman writing this blog. Back then, I was still plagued with ‘what ifs’:
- What if they are smarter than me?
- What if they are ahead of me?
- What if I don’t know how to do this? [helllllooooo, you don’t, this why you invested in the coach?!]
So many ‘what ifs’ and I noticed that these were still in my subconcious prior to arriving in North Carolina.
That girl who didn’t fit in and felt like the misfit was showing up, plaguing me with concerns about my body, business and success.
When I arrived I realised that I’m not that girl.
I’m not shy and no longer hiding away from my true purpose.
What I realised in that moment is, that girl would never have invested in a coach, she wouldn’t have booked a flight, or flown alone because she was more concerned about perception than living her life fully.
I used to believe that for me to be successful people must first like me, what I learnt is that I get to show up as the woman I’ve always been and people get to make a choice whether or not they like me.
I’m incredibly grateful for my life, and for the special people I have met and connected with.
I still want more.
I’m learning that wanting more out of my life has always been inside of me, but it was only when I prioritised my health, lost the body fat that held me back and started to see the world with a different perspective I was able to achieve more.
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