Have you ever heard something a few times, but it just doesn’t sink in?
This time two years ago, my biz coach shared a golden piece of information, something which has the ability to make you super uncomfortable.
“Draw a line in the sand. You don’t want people sitting on the fence.”
I wasn’t even sure I knew what “drawing a line in the sand” meant, but it quickly became clear to me, that this was something I thought I was doing…but I wasn’t.
I was trying to please everyone.
I tried to please every single follower and subscriber, which is unrealistic and unachievable both in real life AND online.
When I tried to please everyone, I wasn’t be true to my message. It was like an awkward smile and giggle when someone says something inappropriate…but you’re too scared to tell them “THAT’S NOT OKAY”.
I cannot be everything to everyone, what I can be is true to myself, and some people will resonate and want more.
The people who I don’t resonate with? They can unsubscribe.
Any online entrepreneur will tell you, part of having an email list is also receiving the “unsubscribes”. We all do it, we decide something isn’t what we expected or perhaps we’re no longer interested — it’s 100% okay.
This is especially relevant because today’s email was about the process of unsubscribes, and I linked our human desire to be liked by others to the way I used to feel when I received notification of an unsubscribe to my email list.
I allowed the people who no longer wanted to be on my email list affect my mood, I’d take it personally, which is ridiculous because I likely didn’t know them in real life and as I said — it’s 100% okay.
You see when you’re in business and solely focused on ‘the numbers’ i.e. infomercial sales, a number makes a difference and these guys don’t actually give a shit about you.
This isn’t my reason for running an online coaching business, my reasons run deep, they are personal. I don’t want other women to feel the way I felt for one more second, and the best way to teach what I’ve learnt is by sharing my struggles and my successes.
Being able to let go of the “unsubscribes” of life is an incredible lesson to learn.
How often are we holding onto the resentment, the past, the frustration of something which isn’t going to actually help us create our future?
So after another charade of checking who it was that had unsubscribed from my email list, and not actually being able to do a thing about it, I decided that I needed to ‘clear’ my email list.
Clearing your email list, is removing people who are not reading the emails. This is not nasty, this is not an ego rubbing strategy, in fact quite the opposite as we live in a world which associates popularity by numbers. This is a business strategy.
There I was with this task on my ‘to do’ list for about TWO MONTHS, subconsciously putting it off. What I was really doing was hoping that people would start reading my emails so that the number went down.
Yes, I was being a tad obsessive.
The funny thing is that when you put your life online, and you’re discussing an emotional topic such as weight loss AND you don’t follow any MLM or weight loss fad bull shit…well you’re inevitably going to upset people.
We don’t all have to agree, but can we be civil?
You see unsubscribing is pretty civil, there’s no argument, there aren’t any harsh words uttered. You just click a button. UNSUBSCRIBE.
I applaud you fellow “unsubscriber’s” because in the real world we do not unsubscribe from the people or situations which we should. The things we don’t really want to be a part of, the things which are not what we expected, we allow them to continue hanging around.
We continue subscribing even when it is affecting our own happiness.
I once heard Megsquats say “…when you have 100,000 followers on social media, are you going to focus on the 1 person who doesn’t like you or the 99,999 people who do?”
This week was the start of a challenge I’m hosting, and we are focusing on some incredibly important work. It’s already transformational and this topic is incredibly appropriate. The challenge of journalling has opened up many new topics, and I vow to unsubscribe to situations in which I no longer need to be a part of.
I’m going to focus on the 99,999, and if that’s you then lets connect!
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